The last day of work

The last day of my employment was yesterday.  I knew I was not really "ready" to leave when I got to the parking lot and began to cry such that I could not get out of the car.  A song had just come on by Trace Adkins with lyrics about his "love" dumping him and he kept singing "help me understand".  I don't know if that was the full trigger to my emotions, or the fact that I removed my parking permit to return to the company.  But either way, the damn burst and I spent 10 - 15 minutes just sitting in the car crying.  I did not know if I could get in the building, but I reached out to my daughter on the phone, like a life-line, and asked her to "talk me inside".  She did a great job of calming me down enough to walk to the length of the parking lot in to the building that had seemed like home for so long. 
Once I got to my office, I calmed down and got to the business of making it my last day.  I had a few loose ends to tie up and had been invited to a final lunch date by a close friend so I had that to look forward to.  A few people stopped by my office that morning to wish me well, and that elicited a bit of emotion but nothing I couldn't breathe through. 
Lunch was fantastic and the only part of the day that felt normal.  She took me to our favorite haunt and we ate and laughed like it was a normal day.  Then I faced my empty desk and office again after lunch.
I want to tell you that for a while after lunch, I did not think I could get up and actually leave my office.  At one point I pictured myself just sitting there until Saturday morning, refusing to leave, but reality set in about 1:30pm and I realized I might as well just leave and get it over with. 
My office is (was) on the 3rd floor so I started there, visiting people and getting hugs.  Although it was so sad for me, I really felt loved by the people that I had worked with for so long.  I got genuine hugs and well wishes and a card or two.  I hit every floor on the way down to the front door and it took me almost an hour and a half to see everyone that I could say goodbye to.  By the time I reached the front door, I felt a bit of peace, at least in the fact that no "particular someone" did not want me around anymore, but that it was only an organizational decision that I should not let hurt me so much. 
I did not send a blanket email to everyone telling them goodbye.. I just could not trust myself to write it.  So there are people that I cared for that I have not told goodbye and that makes me sad.  I don't want them to feel that I purposely excluded them.
So on the last day of my job, the first day of my unemployed status, I finally felt a bit of closure.  I suppose this is not the end of the grieving process, but I can tell you with a certainty, that this is the first day of the rest of my life!